This is the most annoying year of my life. everyone around seems to be dying, or have some serious illness.

eg. today. i thought its like any normal day, but while passing her house, i saw the singapore casket van thing outside mrs tan's hosue (my science tuition teacher). i already had prior knowledge that her husband had cancer. so, i knew exactly what has happened.

earlier this year, my grandmother died. )): then sometime last year, my mum's friend died.
i have at least 3 relatives who already have some serious illness.

wth. why must everyone around me be leaving? whats god's reason for letting this happen? why do all the good ppl die, while all the bad ppl in this world are still running around?

after thinking it through, it made me realize. all this is probably just a reminder. our existance on this earth is just like. some way we're passing through on the way to be with God. whats the point of making some big impact in this world? if you think about it. some high ranking guy, say some prime minister may have all the power on earth. he might be the king of the earth. but, all that doesnt matter when he dies. however, some poor idiot hobo guy may be christian. all in all, he'll still be better off in the end.

after long consideration, i have been led to believe one thing. DYING ROCKS! when you die, u don't feel any hurt anymore. u can't feel any heartbreak. u don't have all sorts of problems. you just get to meet God. what can be better than that?

well, of course, we can't just kill ourselves in order for that to happen. we still need to follow god's plan, cause he already planned something for us, so we really should follow it. thus, i'm just going to go through life, waiting for my turn to die.

even if i do, no one will really care anyway.